The Leaders Debate?

With 19 days left before the General Election, ITV hosted the first 'Leaders Debate's,' well, sort of. Neither the Conservatives or Labour were in attendance which of course just left the also-rans, who seemed to think they were appearing at a curtain-call for the next Mr. Men movie. In a two-hour live debate without any real focus, not a lot actually happened. This is apart from what appeared to be a very good-natured affair, with jokes, merriment, and banter, where we can be sure lots of ginger-pop and scones were consumed afterward.

What was said

Mr. Forgetfull, in the guise UKIP's Paul Nuttall's few contributions, was most certainly getting the name of the leader of Plaid Cymru, Miss Angry, aka, Leanne Wood, repeatedly wrong. Calling her Natalie - no doubt in reference to the actress who fell from her boat into the Pacific Ocean and drowned in 1981, or even, Natalie Bennett, former Green Party leader who did not - she eventually snapped at him, and he shut up. He only came to life in his closing statement, saying 'that together we can put the Great back in Britain.' A sentiment used to much effect only quite recently on the other side of the Atlantic by a mutual friend of the UKIP party. Miss Bossy was there in the guise of Nicola Sturgeon, acting the headmistress, as usual, but freely admitting that her own party had been far from on the ball in steering Scotlands affairs in the right direction, alluding especially to the mistakes made in Education and that a new referendum was, a way down the road yet.

Tim Fallon, Mr. Nice, just wanted everyone to be, well, nice to one another; the only positive note being that he wanted to stop any harsh Brexit by the Conservatives. Miss Nice, the Greens Caroline Lucas, smiled a lot and only really wanted to build a bigger and more caring future. Finally Ms. Wood assured everyone watching that, 'you can rely on Plaid Cymru to defend Wales,' allowing the armed forces of the UK to sleep easy in their beds for a further few nights.

So there's lovely then?

Now that the manifestoes have mostly escaped from captivity we can all get a broader picture of each parties intent, and a jolly mixed bag it is as well. So one can only hope that the next televised Leaders Debate, where the main parties will not be attending once again, will be a far more, focused, heated and passionate affair than the last one was, or those watching will need something stronger than the pop on offer...