In the world of #Simon Cowell everything is up for manipulation, or is it? The loss of Sean Miley Moore from the X Factor had Cowell's square jaw dropping a long way to clang on his desk.
With 11 contestants left the public booted Kiera Weathers straight into touch and matched Stephen Hendry lookalike Mason Noise with Australian Transvestite Moore in the quaintly titled sing off. Anyone with hearing could tell that Moore easily won the contrived, edge-of-the-seat-keep-em-dangling tune fencing.
With Cowell voting to jettison Noise and Cheryl with the extremely long name following suit, it looked like the long and winding road for Mason Binnell (his real name). Incredibly, fluffy eared Rita Ora (it's a singing contest Rita!) then decided she wanted to send Seann Miley Moore home. When Nick 'Extremely Grim' Grimshaw chickened out of attempting to make a decision at all, it went down to the wire and the public vote.
In a heart thumping extra long pause to build up as much tension as possible moment the world and its dog waited and waited and then waited some more, only to discover that squeaky bum Mason Noise had survived. A set up?
Ask Simon Cowell, who is suddenly friends with Mason after an earlier spat in which the said Mr Noise walked out of the competition at the bizarrely named six chair challenge. A set up? Message to self, check paranoia.
Losing Moore this early must have proved a wicked blow to Simon and his fellow judges, the guy was unusual, certainly different, and, of course, he could sing super karaoke.
He could actually sing really well, and while Max Stone, Monica Michael and Anton Stephans – who for some reason strikes me as a weird Gomez Addams character – seemed far more likely candidates for the one way trap door, the great British public decided to say adios to Seann.
There was a future out there for Esemem, but now he has he gone too early, by the final he will be forgotten. He will watch the final extravaganza from a sofa in his flat, his mascara running as he stuffs himself full of chocolates?
A young Stephen Hendry lookalike Mason Noise (an alternative career if he is bumped off X Factor?) lives to fight another day but the belt-out-the-toon contest exposed a weaker voice than Seann Miley Moore, and we can only wonder how much longer he will last.
Che Chesterton remains my own favourite to sing his brains out to the final with Louisa Johnson joining him. Here I would have said Seann Miley Moore was a stick-on for the last three, but he's gone and no one can believe he has left the building.