It would seem, that although it is nearing Christmas, that on a night out clubbing the youth of the age are still choosing to wear as little as possible. I noticed this with my own eyes whilst standing outside of my local nightclub and being told that I was dressed like an old lady by drunken slur proceeding to exit from a quite inebriated girl who clearly had been enjoying too much of the Christmas spirit. It occurred to me that whilst I may look more suited to tea and scones with my grandma, in my comfortable cardigan and thick woolly tights, that dressing like an old lady isn't exactly a bad thing at all.
So here are some of my positives and negatives of the Old Lady Dress code.
- Nice and Warm - Let's be honest, it is never easy wearing nothing but a skimpy dress all night, especially when wearing a jacket, in your friend's opinion, would ruin the look. No matter how many times you jump up and down or even huddle with your friends you are never quite warm enough. Although I can be stood outside happily watching them with a smile, nice and comfortable in my cardigan
- No dodgy chat up lines - We have all been here, when you are dancing in a nightclub and someone sidles over and comes out with a chat up line so cheesy, you could grate it. Well no fear. In the old lady clothes, no one will. It has been psychologically proven that the inebriated human mind relates lack of clothes to that person being their match for the night. So sit back and relax in the safe knowledge that your dancing will not be interrupted.
- You do know you look like an old lady right? - As I experienced the other night, there is a huge downfall to the look. Everyone will frequently tell you that you look like their grandparents. As wonderful as it is to know that your idea has worked, it does tend to annoy you slightly when drunken girls take a selfie with you to take back to their grandparents for a laugh at the similarities.
- Oh here take mine! - This one is the greatest fact for lads. If you have a big warm cardigan on, and a girl, cold from her winter dress of a skimpy swimsuit style top, complains she is in fact cold, then you can jump to her rescue and win her heart with a sensible clothing choice.
- My wardrobe is too small - This is probably the biggest issue of it all. Once you get hooked on wearing the grandparent style clothes, you won't be able to get enough of the woolly jumpers and fluffy tights. You simply won't have enough room, but no fear! Due to the cold weather I have solved this issue. Layering! Because one jumper is never enough.
Of course, when the summer time comes back round I will be back into my own disco pants, but until then, I am going to sit back and enjoy my old lady clothes, because although it might not be the most stylish. I am too damn warm to care.